BBUK - The Launch Part Two.

Launch night number two began with what we assumed, refreshingly, was a recap without showing us everything we’d seen the night previous… we got too happy too soon. 10 minutes later and we finally saw some fresh action, clearly not much happened that first night. Time to throw in six more!

Housemate No.11 – Toya A Washington

29 – London – Video Blogger

She auctioned off her ex boyfriends possessions on eBay.

She’s passionate about herself.

She doesn’t get into fights because she was bullied.

Her Mama didn’t raise no fool so don’t toy with TOYa unless you want all your worldly possessions auctioned off on eBay. It’ll be interesting to see who she becomes friends with in the house, will she be team girl and rub them the wrong way with her no nonsense attitude?

Housemate No.12 – Chris R Wright

33 – Hampshire – Actor

Is going into the house for the free rent.

He’s very polite.

He has a very dry sense of humour.

Our polite little entirely vanilla cupcake of comedy with a NORMAL size ego. That’s because he’s one of the few who has not walked straight off a catwalk. He’s naturally funny, a little bit grumpy and has a funny shaped head, what’s not to like?

Housemate No.13 – Ashleigh Coyle

18 – Derry – School Leaver

She lives on a council estate and says it pushes her to achieve more.

She’s a vegetarian and big fundraiser for animal charities.

If modeling fails she wants to own a wedding planning business.

She was just 3, yes 3, when the first ever BB began! That alone should give us reason to hate her, add in the fact she’s bloody beautiful and bam! But somehow we don’t, she’s adorable. Baby of the house couldn’t be sweeter unless she had hundreds and thousands sprinkled all over her. Not sure that the Northern Irish nipper can handle the seedy hellhole where dreams die.

Housemate No.14 – Marlon Wallen

22- Croydon – ‘Wild Boy’

Spends all his money on his appearance and clubbing.

He’d rather have money than love.

His alter ego is called Marlicio Silver.

Despite the arrogance and blatant womanizing ways we can’t help but like him. His wild boy ways will either make him loved or loathed, it’s going to be a very fine line.

Housemate No.15 – Ash Harrison

26 – Manchester – Model

Says his look have given him an easy life.

Is a big party boy.

Still lives at home with his mum as he enjoys her cooking.

Oh look, a model. We’ll take him seriously when he has a half decent haircut. Gets by on his look, is ‘well known’ on the Manchester party scene… by rights we should hate him, in fact he should scream wannabe! But somehow his laid back, slick attitude endears him.

Housemate No.16 – Jale Karaturp

33 – Surrey – Customer Adviser

She likes to rant about most things.

Lives on her own because she can’t live with other people.

Has a strong political view on benefits and unemployment.

NORMAL PERSON ALERT. Jale has an actual job, like, a real one! For this reason alone we’re going to crown an early favourite, she even loves to rant just like us.

Once they'd made it down those stairs without breaking any limbs it was time for Pauline to hand Helen a pass to the final! They both seemed pretty delighted with it. The fun did't end there though, oh no, twist two was revealed. On Sunday Pauline will pick someone as the unlucky recipient for her 'killer nomination' where they'll face eviction EVERY SINGLE TIME! It couldn't be more amazing (assuming she picks someone we approve of).

BBUK - The Launch, Part One.

Big Brother is officially BACK! Our summer of love, loathe and laughter has begun. The house is one of the best in recent years and the theme has real potential not to fizzle out after the first week. Last night we met our first batch of housemates, you’d be forgiven for thinking you’d tuned into the Apprentice by accident! The majority seem like the same person with a different outfit, lets hope there’s more to them than an expensive suit or blouse…

Housemate No.1 – Tamara Stewart-Wood

24 – London – Headhunter

The most important person in her life is herself.

She’s fiercely independent.

Usually dates guys who are ‘fit but thick’.

Instantly came across as the bitchy ice-queen, but from past experience (Gina) Big Brother fans including us love the occasional bitch. She seems like the girl who will do anything to get ahead of other people, whether that is using her looks, intelligence or manipulation; not normally winning traits.

Housemate No.2 – Mark Byron

24 – Liverpool – Fashionista

Gets his hair professionally done four times a week.

Has a short temper and doesn’t back down in arguments.

Gets on with everyone apart from ‘dickheads’.

Conchita-would-be-well-jel and shouting Austrian abuse over the beard and HD brows on this Mariah Carey idolising Scouser. He certainly wasn’t ‘avin’ it’, that is until the money came blowing his way. It’ll be interesting to see how he copes in a house full of power mad players, can’t imagine many offering to do his fake tan.

Housemate No.3 – Helen Wood

27 – Bolton – Northerner

Hit the headlines after having a threesome with Wayne Rooney.

Lives with her 10 year old son.

Hates materialistic people.

The bolshy Bolton babe seems like a normal lass that we'd actually get on with. It remains to be seen whether she’ll fall under the normal and bloody boring category or the normal and we-can-so-relate-she-has-to-win category

Housemate No.4 – Steven Goode

23 – Hertfordshire – Entrepreneur

Would choose money over love.

He’s generous but controlling.

Thinks he will be the centre of attention.

We think he walked into the wrong audition, can someone let the poor guy know this isn’t the Apprentice. Appears very materialistic, money mad and cutthroat, time will tell if it’s all an act or he is actually that much of a twat.

  

Housemate No.5 – Danielle McMahon

25 – Glasgow – Lingerie Model

Has strict catholic views and doesn’t believe in gay marriage.

She’s trying to launch a new type of ‘wonderbra’.

Her idols are God and her mum.

Welcome the worlds biggest walking, talking, lingerie posing, homophobic (but she isn’t homophobic) contradiction.

Housemate No.6 – Winston Showan

27 – Essex – Lad

Wants to be a famous racing car driver.

Is looking for love in the house.

Says his friends would describe him as ‘unintentionally hilarious’.

LADiator. A potential WINner perhaps as he'll ease into this experience like a bum in a warm bath. Very much a ladies man, brain in his… well not on his shoulders. His laid back cheeky attitude will be breath of fresh air amongst the rest of the bunch.

Housemate No.7 – Matthew Davies

23 – Hertfordshire – Media Graduate

Describes himself as stereotypically feminine and camp.

Gets on best with intelligent people.

Says he’s a troublemaker.

Could easily be an extra on Made in Chelsea. He’s a non-mopper, with an intolerance of thick people and is now crapping himself after giving it all the Charlie big potatoes in his VT. Can’t help but instantly like him. Poor chap with either do a midnight runner or win it.

Housemate No.8 – Kimberly Kisselovich

23 – California – Playboy Bunny & Lawyer

Has spent time in the Playboy Mansion.

Is a cheerleader turned Lawyer.

Claims she’d clash with anyone from Essex.

Playboy scouted FULL TIME BUSINESS WOMAN AND (not a typical… they all say that) MODEL (yes another!) but she's American and ruthless too.

Housemate No.9 – Christopher Hall

23 – County Fermanagh – Journalist

Is a big fan of Katie Hopkins and White Dee.

He’s passionate about having an opinion.

Worst personality traits are being melodramatic and overexcited.

The journalistISH, greatness aspirer tears strips off Kim Kardashian devil worshippers devoid of personality yet has willingly walked into a house filled to the brim with these superficial spawns of Satan! We don't really get why he wants to associate with those that repulse him. He’ll either be a saint or sinner. Seems intelligent and witty enough to deal with the power hungry people in the house.

Housemate No.10 – Pauline Bennett

49 – Wolverhampton – Dance Teacher

Doesn’t suffer fools gladly.

Had a top 10 single with Kylie.

Will be turning 50 in the house.

She’s got the POWER! 

Another SIX enter the house tonight and there's a big twist that's never been done before and is said to change the game forever...

MTV Ex On The Beach - Episode Seven

They certainly saved the best until last, well not quite last but almost last, assuming next weeks isn’t better, although it probably will be. They certainly saved one of the best until near the last! Here’s 21 things we learnt from the penultimate episode…

1. Joss doesn’t even flinch when Hulk Ash comes flying at him.

2. Marco and Ash are the new Ant and Dec – if Ant and Dec had tattoos and matching hair.

3. Ash is deep. Deeper than Barry White. Deeper than Katie Price bent over. He’s deep.

4. Getting fingered off Jack is apparently the perfect way to get over someone. Maybe they’ll put that sentiment on a greeting card.

5. Vicky is buzzing like an old fridge.

6. If you ever want a good bitch with legendary hilarity, call Vicky.

7. No matter how many cushions and candles you put down in a graveyard it will never be romantic – unless you’re Ross and Shelby.

8. A few hours is an appropriate amount of time to move on for Chloe and Ash.

9. The dictionary of Ross. Beat and delete. Fuck and chuck. We imagine there’s plenty more.

10. Liam was bang on form.

11. Even we nearly shit our pants with the tension levels on that beach.

12. Ricci is a dickhead.

13. Ricci is pathetic.

14. Ricci is that weird stain you find on bed sheets in cheap hotels.

15. We don’t like Ricci.

16. Liam is no longer Chief Stirrer he is now the King of Enlightenment.

17. We’ve fallen in love with Dan even more.

18. Ricci needs a translator.

19. Chloe gave up trying to be a girls girls pretty quickly.

20. Talitha cheated on Joss!

21. The voiceover man is brilliant.

INTERVIEW - Liam Lewis (Ex On The Beach)

It's no secret we're slightly obsessed with MTV show Ex On The Beach so when we got the opportunity to speak to our favourite stirrer Liam we had plenty to ask him...

What made you want to take part in the show?

I’d seen the advert and it was advertised as a summer of love, six singles living together in a villa. Obviously that was appealing straight away. Then there was the cruel twist of the exs’ that we had no idea about. Just living abroad in paradise with a load of girls appeals to any lad I think.

When did it first dawn on you that the exs’ was the big twist?

Not straight away. The first ex to come in was Ross and he’d had a little bit of history with Chloe but they weren’t proper exs’ so we didn’t really think too much of that at first, we just thought ‘oh probably a little bit of a coincidence’. Then on day three Frankie got dropped in and that was Marcos’ proper ex so it was ‘yep we’ve all been stitched up here’.

Were you worried?

I wouldn’t say worried but obviously a little bit apprehensive because like we’ve all said they’re exs’ for a reason. My exs’, I don’t really want anything to do with them. It just felt like it was a massive spoiler; we weren’t really there for that. I personally just thought ‘ah bugger it’.

You became ‘chief stirrer’ fairly early on, why was that?

It probably was a bit of boredom to be honest. We were having a class time and doing all sorts of different activities and that but obviously I was there to meet a girl. It wasn’t going to plan, pardon the phrase, but it was all a bit of a cock block because all the girls were exs’ of someone, so it was like ‘oh god how am I going to pull here’. Ash and Marco were more bothered about their hair and what they were wearing than having a bit of banter so I just thought I’d go and mix things up a bit; cause a bit of drama.

What stirring are you most proud of?

That’s a good question! Erm, probably the Frankie bits. She just bit so much. On the show you only see little snippets of it all but that went on all day, she was absolutely raging. If she’d have said ‘nah you’re lying’ then that would probably have been the end of it, the fact she kicked off so much made it all the more funny really.

You’ve made it clear you’re not the biggest fan of Ash and Marco, is that still the case or was it just confined to the show?

Whilst we were there yeah I wasn’t a fan of them whatsoever, I didn’t have any time for them, they’re not the sorts of lads I hang around with. I like lads you can have a bit of banter with and that type of thing. Since the show, it’s took a while like, the show was filmed seven months ago so there’s been a lot of time to catch-up doing things for MTV, we’ve got to know each other a bit more and we’re a lot more friendly now and we do get on.

We’ve seen you go on a few dates with Emily that didn’t go too well, why do you think that was?

I don’t know, when Emily isn’t on a date and it’s everyone together she’s so funny, so witty and her banter is really good, we got on really well. But when we went on the dates she was like dead tense and stuff, she had a wall up so it was really hard to get her to break that down. Maybe she fancied us a little bit and was nervous, that’s what I’ve said to her.

You went of a date with Talitha that went a bit better, but still no romance, were you disappointed?

Talitha, she’s gorgeous and stuff and I did fancy her but obviously she was with Ash so I felt a little bit harsh if I tried to make a move or anything. I didn’t really want to put Talitha in that situation because she actually genuinely liked Ash. Emily was a bit uptight whereas Talitha was dead outgoing and just went along with things.

What has it been like watching the show back?

Funny… hilarious, just watching all the stirring and how people react. It’s totally different watching it back to how it all happened. A lot more goes on and you don’t see all the little bits and bobs but it’s been really good to watch back. I think it’s totally different to anything else on TV isn’t it, a lot more drama involved, and it’s been good.

What’s the reaction been like from people on the streets and places like twitter?

Crazy, absolutely crazy. Before the show started I had like 5000 followers and now I’ve got 60 odd thousand, that shows how much the show has blew up and everywhere I go now I get recognised, they’re like ‘you’re the stirrer’. To say I’ve caused loads of havoc and loads of arguments fans seem to enjoy it.

There’s only a couple of episodes left now, what can we expect? Plenty more drama?

I can guarantee the episodes get better and better now. Also when Ricci comes its just absolute carnage. Vicky hates him with a passion, she makes that quite clear. He comes out the water with a bang, Vicky instantly reacts to him. The thing was me and Vicky were really good mates in the house so I made the decision that I didn’t want to make any effort with Ricci for the simple reason I didn’t want to upset Vicky. She’s become like a loyal friend and I didn’t want to cross that path and because I do that it just creates so much trouble. It’s going to be good to watch.

Once the show is over can we expect to see you on our TV again or do you have other plans?

Hopefully series two will come along, there’s nothing confirmed yet, MTV haven’t given anything away, but fingers crossed I’ll be on series two stirring things up again. If not hopefully I’ll be on TV in another capacity, it’s a waiting game now.

MTV Ex On The Beach - Episode Six

There are only two episodes left! What the bugger are we going to do with our Tuesday nights when it’s all over? It makes us sad to think about that so for now we’ll concentrate on the corking that was episode 6, here’s 19 we learnt…

1. If you get asked a question in Spanish and you answer in English everyone will understand everything – apparently.

2. ‘Do you know what I mean’; we know what you mean Rossy. Please don’t ask us again.

3. There were some weird fancy dress outfits. We think Ash was a ballerina emerging from a top hat and Joss was a transvestite matador.

4. Jack was at it again, ‘Joss let me smell ya fingers’ ah the romance.

5. Ross and Joss like to share.

6. Everyone seems to dump Joss for other guys. Poor pretty Joss.

7. Vicky has very reserved first impressions of people ‘not only is she boring she’s a slag’ – Jack must have been delighted.

8. It takes Jack approximately 6 seconds to get naked.

9. Jack got sad because he couldn’t see Emilys’ tits.

10. Vicky and Dan, sitting in a canoe…

11. Liam admitted defeat ‘me and you couldn’t pull in a brothel’

12. Ash doesn’t mind spending time with Talitha if he has to – how sweet.

13. Ross and Chloe didn’t at all get caught in an innocent yet compromising position. Only someone lurking with a camera could have made it look worse… oh wait…

14. Chloe has a death stare that rivals Ashs’.

15. Ross is running out of screen space for his list of ex heads.

16. We LOVE the psychotic jealous side to Farah. If it were a movie she’d have definitely shaved Shelbys’ head by now.

17. We didn’t enjoy our lack of Marco & Jeff action. This is not acceptable.

18. We’re pretty sure Ash is the hulk, but when he gets angry he doesn’t turn green, his hair just gets taller.

19. Episode 7 looks like total carnage. We cannot wait.