21.8.14

Geordie Shore - Episode Five.



Episode 5 and we have another newbie! The house is now full to the brim and things are kicking off… we love it. Gaz made love, Scott finally sorted his hair out, there was bitching, girl time and the arrival of a bloody beautiful bastard. Here’s what we learnt…

1. You get fingered on your 3rd date; everybody knows that.
2. Gaz made love. Awwwww.
3. Brake brake brake brake!
4. Finally Scott realised his hair looks shit, finally we don’t feel dirty fancying him.
5. Awkward. Aaron listened in on a girls bitching session. It was like watching a baby hippo torn apart by a pack of lionesses.
6. That was the most awkward moment of Vicky's life. We're quite shocked, to be honest we presumed she’d been in more compromising positions.
7. Aaron isn’t mad. He's disappointed.
8. We've never laughed at someone clicking quite so much.
9. Vicky kissed baby Bieber, it may have taken top spot for most embarrassing moment of her life. Poor kids probably grounded now his mum’s seen he was out on a school night.
10. Gary took part in the ice bucket challenge without even realising thanks to Marnie. Good lad.
11. Psycho Vicky came out to play. We’re both scared and excited, like queuing for a rollercoaster after stuffing 3 hotdogs down… it’s going to get messy,
12. Vicky was so drunk she started communicating with sign language. Quite the hidden skill.
13. James cooked steak and looked fit. That was it.
14. Scotty T knows to work a skirt.
15. Holly looked like Jason from Halloween’s much scarier and sister during girl time.
16. Operation steal Gary's heart when South faster than pre-sassy Holly.
17. Gaz and his obsession with lad time is getting suspicious.
18. Vicky whipped out another classic 'She’s got your vagina on a lead'
19. Kyle has arrived and in the words of Aaron; what a good looking bastard.
20. Gaz and James turned into schoolgirls bitching about the cool kids. We’ve seen Ryan Gosling ex’s that are less jealous.
21. Scott was delighted to have a massive mate; him and Kyle could be like the cheeky girls on steroids.
22. Kyle is a nice person.

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